binge watching the walking dead: a memoir
1. Every episode is grosser than the last.
This is the grossest show I’ve ever seen on TV, really.
2. They have like five different cars a day but they never seem to need fuel.
Our heroes have limitless sources of transportation, what with all the abandoned vehicles and everything. Sometimes they hang on to a favorite truck for several episodes but they never stop to siphon or otherwise obtain fuel.
3. Carl is the only one who wears the same thing every day.
Okay he’s like ten, but where are the others getting clothes? Not from dead people. Their clothes are ripped and covered in blood and gore.
4. Everyone instinctively knows how to use a variety of weapons.
There is a spectrum of firearm competency among our heroes, ranging from seasoned sheriff to sweet farm girl. Somehow all of these people can pick up an assault rifle, a crossbow, a Colt Python, a smoke grenade, or an Uzi and hit a moving target in the head at fifty yards. The assortment of fire power on this show is staggering.
5. All of the stores have been looted, obviously. Yet, our heroes can walk into a deserted bar and find it fully stocked.
I call bullshit on this. The bar would be the first thing to be picked completely clean, followed by the pharmacy.
6. Rick’s and Merle’s beards are always at 5 O’Clock shadow.
7. Where’s the food?
I’ve never seen them eat anything, ever. Okay Daryl ate a squirrel once.
8. Why can’t anyone get that piece of glass out of the Governor’s eye?
I mean really.
9. How do they all still have power and water?
And ammo. They never run out of bullets, arrows, or grenades.
10. Despite the ridiculousness of the whole zombie plague / apocalypse notion I find my mind wandering at times, wondering if I should make a plan.